Going to an event alone: the first 15 minutes

Do not set yourself the goal of “making friends tonight”. That is too much work for one walk, game or coffee. A better target is to stay for 45 minutes and exchange a few sentences with two people.

Check the exact place, time and host name. If there is a group chat, write a short note: “I’m coming alone and should be there around 19:00.” When you arrive, you are looking for one person rather than scanning an unfamiliar room.

For a small event, the start time is usually the easiest moment. The host is still welcoming people, groups are still open, and you have a natural question: “Is this the meetup for…?”

Keep your phone in your pocket for the first five minutes. It offers shelter, but also signals that you are unavailable. Get some water, find the host and ask whether they need a hand with anything.

• Say hello to the host first.
• Stand near the shared activity, not in the furthest corner.
• If somebody else is alone, start with them.

At a board-game night, ask which game is starting. On a hike, ask whether the pace is relaxed. At a language exchange, ask how long somebody has lived in Sofia. The context does half the work for you.

If a conversation ends, nothing has gone wrong. “I’m going to grab a drink — nice meeting you” is a perfectly normal close. You can then return to the host or join the activity itself.

Agree on a minimum, not a sentence. If you still feel uncomfortable after 45 minutes, thank the host and go. Showing up once already makes the next attempt easier.

If you are enjoying yourself, stay. Before leaving, say goodbye to the person you spoke with most. A simple “Will you come again?” is enough to turn a chance conversation into a possible second one.

For a first meeting, choose a public place, tell someone where you are and keep control of your journey home. Do not leave a drink unattended, and do not feel obliged to stay or share contact details. A healthy event will not ask you to ignore your instincts.